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Aug 14 2009

42.0 Ways To Tell If Someone May Be A Stoner

Published by houroc under Cannabis News, Lists

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Stoner friends are the best. If you have no bud, they might have some and come and blaze with you. You laugh together, cry together, and cough up smoke together. Finding new smoking buddies makes me very excited but you have to be careful trying to find new friends who smoke because afterall, it is illegal and all.

Have you ever been suspicious of a co-worker or friend being a stoner but you weren’t sure? Here are 42.0 ways for you to find out if you potentially have a new smoking buddy or not. These are not all true for every smoker so they won’t always apply but many of them apply to many smokers.

Hopefully no cops are reading this.  If you are a cop, leave my page immediately, but click on some ads before you go.

  1. They always have a lighter, but you never see them smoke
  2. They always smell like weed
  3. You go to their house and hailmaryjane.com is in their browsing history.
  4. You see them hop out of this van.vw_van37
  5. If you ask them a question, every single response is “what? or “what did you say man?”
  6. If you are a stoner yourself, usually you can just tell.  Sort of like a stoner 6th sense.
  7. If they are funny and usually calm.
  8. Sometimes you see them and their eyes are red as hell and others they aren’t.
  9. They are always “tired.”
  10. Check the bottom of their lighter. If it has black marks on the bottom of their lighter, you know they been using it to push down bowls / snub out joints.
  11. Their lighter has no safety0925080040_545x409.shkl
  12. If they smoke cigarettes, they hold it between their index and thumb, instead of between their middle find and index.
  13. Their DVD collection includes half baked, how high, pineapple express, or any number of the other movies on this list.
  14. They are always smiling.
  15. They walk, move and/or talk slowly.
  16. Half the cardboard has been ripped off their pack of papers
  17. They like it big….420-chick-17
  18. Burnt finger tips
  19. Burnt lips aka smokers lip.
  20. Their ipod contains songs from this list.
  21. They always take a break at work at 4:20 pm.
  22. Stoners usually have baggy eyes, whether they are high or not.
  23. If you have dreads you are probably a stoner, if you are white and have dreads you are almost certainly a stoner.stoner-791927
  24. If they own a long board.  Where do you think they are riding? To go get stoned, duh!
  25. They use the term “dank for almost anything.  (Dank food, dank drinks, dank bud, etc.)
  26. They wear sun glasses at night
  27. They are very good with fractions (1/8ths, 1/4ths, 1/2ths, etc.) and conversions (28.3 g=1 ounce and 16o= 1 pound)
  28. If they are wearing a Bob Marley, Kottonmouth Kings, or Cypress Hill tee,
  29. They use Rohto eye drops.  Most people will just use visine but all real stoners know that Rohto is king.Coupon Outline
  30. They are a graduate of Oaksterdam University.
  31. They are from California, Amsterdam or Jamaica.  This isn’t a guarantee but I’ll usually put money on people from these places being stoners.
  32. You meet them at 3am at 7-11 buying two hot dogs, a bag of doritos, skittles, and a 2 liter bottle of pepsi; while you are buying the same thing.
  33. They always got some intellectual shit to say even though its usually irrelevant.
  34. Their favorite color is green, or purple.6-24-08 PurpleWreck (4)
  35. They wear clothes made out of hemp.
  36. You met them at Ziggy Marley concert.
  37. They haven’t shaven in weeks (sometimes, or they might just be grimey)
  38. They pull their cigarette like a blunt.
  39. They dress like a hippy.
  40. Even their pets know how to get it in.qpuj7_545x409shkl1
  41. They can barely make it to the end of a list like this without getting distracted.
  42. Ask them.  Most of the time it will be fine as long as you are not asking a cop, a teacher, or your boss.

Shout outs to my friends at grass city.  This post inspired this post from me.  Did I forget anything?  Leave it in the comments people.

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20 Responses to “42.0 Ways To Tell If Someone May Be A Stoner”

  1. # The Afternoon Dump: Beltre Tears Testicle, Womens Boxing Will Be Boring, Tat of Golden Girls, Sexy German Model, on205th Wants Joanna Kruppa, Happy Birthday Mila Kunis and Ashlynn Brooke « Busted Coverage: Booze, Ladies And Footballon 14 Aug 2009 at 15:30

    [...] Pitino’s press conference doodles [Holy Taco] 42.0 ways to tell if someone may be stoner [Hail Mary Jane] Getafe and creepily BK team up [The Slanch Report] Sexy German model Lena Gercke [DJ Mick] on205th [...]

  2. # Hanson 14 Aug 2009 at 19:34

    "# They can barely make it to the end of a list like this without getting distracted."

    Fuck, you got me.

  3. # gordyon 14 Aug 2009 at 20:09

    i need more photos of that chik!!!

    good article. i did barely make it to the end without becoming distracted.

    damn, i even "know" that same stoner kid!

  4. # Lily on 26 Aug 2009 at 01:23

    I love stoners.

  5. # frogiton 02 Oct 2009 at 22:43

    43. your g/f asks you why your nut always tastes like weed

  6. # dopedon 27 Dec 2009 at 02:07

    Black streaks on their pants from cashing bowls and rubbing them on their legs when there's no ashtray within arm's reach.

  7. # never.ending.queston 29 Dec 2009 at 15:15

    lighters always out of fuel from hittin the bowl

  8. # Domon 05 Jan 2010 at 10:02

    hahaha I’ve been busted by the first one. I don’t smoke cigs so everyone wonders why I have a lighter. So now when someone asks for a lighter, they’re shit out of luck, even though I have one. Unless its one of my buddies.

  9. # sugartitson 14 Jan 2010 at 19:24

    I'm sorry but I don't agree with most of it and i am a hardcore smoker. I don't show most of those signs. About the only one is the black marks on the bottom of my lighter.

  10. # karolon 14 Jan 2010 at 21:12

    when you ask "do you smoke" and they reply "cigarettes?"
    when my kid says "you smell like daddy!"

  11. # Jjjon 22 Jan 2010 at 14:40

    31. Should have British Columbia in it. Obvious choice is obvious.

  12. # coopzon 25 Jan 2010 at 06:37

    when you talk to yourself

  13. # Lyricon 27 Jan 2010 at 07:22

    Ways you can tell someone smokes simply by looking at their house/room
    - You're room smells like incense
    - You support NORML
    - You have more than two candles in your room
    - You have a can of febreeze in your room/living room
    - You have a large tapestry (or more than one) somewhere in your house/apartment/room
    - You have issues of "High Times" laying around

    (my house has all of these things :) I think I might be too predictable though.

    Oh and another one – - You're from Eugene, OR :) Represent!

  14. # GregoryStonedon 27 Jan 2010 at 20:33

    A true stoner knows that 7-11 stops selling their hot dogs at midnight. #32 :)

  15. # Dr.LivingStonedon 11 Feb 2010 at 11:30

    I don't mean to nag or w/e but "SMOKERS LIPS" are a characteristic of crack heads or meth monkeys. I've smoked weed for like 5 years straight and never burned my self, i've get burned but in a good way.

  16. # Robertoon 12 Feb 2010 at 19:14

    you are Right on the Money
    i agree with most of the signs

  17. # Johnon 23 Feb 2010 at 08:02

    Dude these are great… I litterally laughed out loud when i read "41.They can barely make it to the end of a list like this without getting distracted." B/c i realized that it had taken me 20 minutes to read em all! Personally i think unless youve been a stoner and have that 6th sense then it is extreemly hard and near impossible to tell if a person is high if they dont want you to know. But if you go by this list you woulda caught me especially on the "irrelivent intellectual shit" haha! And btw dude with the lighter in the pic has his fly unzipped. and you should add a number 43- Person types a lot on website commentaries.

  18. # Paulon 11 Mar 2010 at 23:22

    I wouldn't worry about the cops so much. Most of the ones I know are stoners, too.

  19. # StonedTonighon 12 Mar 2010 at 01:12

    OMG THAT MADE ME LAUGH!!!!!

  20. # ericon 12 Mar 2010 at 17:08

    @ that one dude from Eugene

    Hey I’m from Eugene too, 541 nigga recognize.

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